Becoming the Blueprint: Speaker Panel
When I was given the opportunity to speak at the BGLA Conference, I knew I couldn’t stand in that space and pretend the journey had been easy. Because it hasn’t been. I spoke openly about what it’s like to live in tension; being a person of faith while also navigating two different worlds, two different categories of life that don’t always feel compatible or understood.
I shared that there were moments I questioned whether this path was too heavy, too demanding, or even too much for someone my age. At 21, doubt doesn’t disappear just because purpose shows up. If anything, it gets louder. There were times I wondered if I was too young to speak with authority, too early in the process to be taken seriously, or too in-between to fully belong anywhere.
But I also made one thing clear: I would not be doing this if I wasn’t called to it. Calling doesn’t remove fear; it gives you a reason to move forward despite it. And in those moments of uncertainty, it was my faith that anchored me. Not a shallow optimism, but a deep conviction that clarity comes through obedience, not comfort.
What mattered most to me while speaking was allowing others to see that it’s okay to keep going even when life feels fragmented, even when doubt exists, even when the road ahead isn’t fully visible. Faith doesn’t mean you never question; it means you trust God enough to walk while the answers are still forming. And no one is meant to do that alone. Community has been essential—people who remind you who you are when you forget, and who stand with you when belief feels fragile.
As Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote, “When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.” Not a physical death, but the death of certainty, ego, and the need to feel fully ready. That quote has stayed with me because calling often requires surrender before understanding.
I’m grateful I was able to share this experience with others … not as someone who has arrived, but as someone still becoming. If my words allowed even one person to feel less alone in their doubts and more confident in continuing forward, then the moment was worth it. Becoming the blueprint doesn’t mean perfection—it means faithfulness, especially when it would be easier to stop.
“You don’t have to be ready to lead — you just have to be willing.”
“Someone is waiting for your story. Someone is praying for the encouragement that your journey carries. Don’t silence yourself because of fear.”
Christel.
